Before I begin, I’m largely aware that I am using social media to protest against social media. That’s the beauty of it.
For me, 2015 will be an interesting year. I’m going on a 2 month trip to and around America, with half of it being by myself. This itself is an amazing feat because I’ve never even left the country, and I also have an enormous hatred/fear of flying and anything to do with aviation (pilots and air force excluded, God bless your souls).
On top of that, I will also not be doing any form of dating or romantic intimacy with anyone this year.
I’ve already written about this situation, but from my perspective, it’s getting worse and worse: social media has too many negative influences on dating. Gone are the days when a couple would meet at a dinner function, or the classic “I-spilled-coffee-on-you-and-then-we-started-chatting” situation. Now, people rely too heavily on social media to make a personal connection with someone and I don’t understand how people can expect a personal relationship with someone if the method of contact is so impersonal.
It’s not that I have a problem with online dating; in fact, I’m all for it if that’s how people choose to meet. However, when it gets to the point that it’s more of a “social media relationship”, then I think people need to step back and get a clear perspective.
In dot point form, here are some of the notes that I am specifically protesting against:
[x] Instead of worrying about what to wear when you meet the in-laws, you’re too busy worrying about how your lover has opened your Snapchat but hasn’t replied straight away.
[x] Now that you have him/her on all forms of social media – Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. – you have too much of an insight into their personal life, one you wouldn’t have had 10 years ago when none of this existed. You freak out when you see that they have just become friends with someone of the opposite sex, or someone of the opposite sex has liked one of their Instagram photos. You have created this entire problem in your head just because of it.
[x] Along with this personal insight, you also happen to know where your lover is at all times. When he/she messages you on Facebook, it’ll say where they are. If you don’t recognise the place they’re at, you’ll freak out. Thus, creating another problem in your head.
[x] Nude photos. OMG. Please stop. If you want your lover to see you and your naked bits, here’s a fancy idea… GO TO THEIR HOUSE AND SHOW THEM.
[x] If you unfortunately happen to break up with your lover, here are how things would’ve happened 10 years ago and here are how things will happen now. 10 years ago, you just stopped calling each other and seeing each other. Now, you have to block them from all forms of social media, delete their phone number, and cancel your Google alert subscription to their name. But then you’re too intrigued about their life and what they’re doing after they broke up with you, so you’ll just go and unblock them anyway. Or, if you’re that intense, you’ll use a friend’s social media account to “stalk” them. All that just to break up with someone? No thank you.
#SayNoToDating2015 is my own personal little campaign protesting against the negative influences social media has on dating. While I understand the need to adapt to changes over the years and have done so accordingly, I don’t think it’s necessary for everyone to become so impersonal when it comes to communication with other people in a romantic way. Dating used to be such an uncomplicated thing and now, well, it’s screwed. Social media should be a tool we use to help build strong relationships with strong foundations, not forge faulty ones that are gonna break with a slight breeze.
Of course, contrasting opinions are welcome. Not that it’ll change my view on #SayNoToDating2015.
– by Noah La’ulu