You Know What Sh!ts Me?: Not Everything is “Glamorising”

Posted in Opinion, What Sh!ts Me by

This will all make sense by the end of this article.

It seems that nowadays one can’t do anything in the spotlight without someone having something negative to say about it. Kim Kardashian, for example – as much as I personally dislike her – cannot blink without someone attacking her on social media, calling her a range of insults from “fat” to “blimp-like hussy”. The unfortunate truth for a celebrity is that while they are relevant, they will always be attacked no matter what.

More recently, however, it seems that there are more and more complaints coming from individuals that seem to have absolutely no social or work life at all. These are the ones that criticise any movie, TV show, book or any other creative work for “glamorising” a bad issue.

Glamorising DVD covers since 2003. (SOURCE: Anna's Flickr photostream)

Glamorising DVD covers since 2003. (SOURCE: Anna’s Flickr photostream)

One of my recent favourite TV shows (that was criminally cut short) is Secret Diary of a Call Girl, featuring Billie Piper *COUGH* Rose Tyler *COUGH* as the main character, Hannah Baxter/Belle du Jour as an escort. It features her daily and nightly shenanigans as Hannah by day and Belle by night. Regardless, it is one hell of an entertaining show and one which I successfully referred to a friend who also loved the series.

What did the critics have to say about this? “Glamorising being a prostitute”.

Um. No.

Actually it is just showing the life of an escort in a witty and entertaining way… based on the real life of a real escort who kept her identity hidden from the world for so long probably for this very reason. A feminist who wrote for the Daily Mail stated that she couldn’t imagine that any escort would enter the profession out of free choice. Well, actually, I can; people were born and raised differently and are therefore very different from one another. While one enjoys having sex and getting paid for it, the other is equally content saving herself until marriage. And there is nothing wrong with either of them. Hello, if you wanted an example of “people being very different from one another”, just watch the show and you will see that some people even enjoy roleplaying as babies while someone else takes care of them as their parent/guardian.

Secret Diary of a Call Girl isn’t the only show to face this pointless, unnecessary fire from bored critics.

Breaking Bad? Glamorising meth.

Dexter? Glamorising serial killing.

Prisonbreak? Glamorising committing a crime and then breaking out of jail.

Fifty Shades of Grey? Glamorising rough S&M.

Stan by Eminem? Glamorising being a psycho-stalker fan and committing suicide.

A friend of mine, who was a big follower of the Breaking Bad TV series, clearly stated that if you properly watched the show, it would turn you off from doing meth. Oh really? And if not made apparent by the highly anti-climatic ending of Dexter, the show did not glamorise serial killing one bit. Just look at how royally fucked his life was because of his choice in alternative hobby.

To those people who think that every creative work has some ulterior motive to ruin today’s generation: buy some Kleenex or build a bridge.

Hell, you might as well say that Doctor Who is glamorising picking up your whole life and leaving with a mad man and his blue box, or that Pokemon is glamorising leaving your family at a young age to explore the world with creatures that speak their name.

This whole pointless glamorising has gotten on my last nerve.

My advice? Watch that TV series and enjoy it. Sit through that movie and enjoy it. Read that book and enjoy it. Listen to that album and enjoy it. But leave it at that. The artists in the world who put their blood, sweat and tears in these works are wasting their time if people are just going to complain and create problems that aren’t even there.

There. I said it.

– by The Black Widow

To Bieb or not to Bieb, that is the question

Posted in Entertainment, Music, Opinion by

We’ve all heard about it over the last few days and rolled our eyes.

Justin Bieber has once again proved to the world why he currently holds the title for World’s Biggest Douchebag – and that’s coming from a self professed Belieber.

Despite the big love I hold for the little cutie, I have to say that he’s not doing much to uphold his reputation at the moment (unless of course you know him for the bad he’s done and not his talent, in which case he’s upholding that reputation to perfection), what with his ‘retiring’ from music so he can drink, drive, drink AND drive, and get high as a kite on Mother Nature’s prohibited greenery. The last thing this kid needed was another headline.

Even with all his sick tatts, is he even that cool? (SOURCE: Justin Bieber's Shots page)

Even with all his sick tatts, is he even that cool? (SOURCE: Justin Bieber’s Shots page)

From the very first time I heard Bieber sing I have vouched for his talent, but I will not tolerate his light hearted attitude towards the law, and neither will the world. As if it wasn’t enough that he spent his time in Australia tagging hotels and went home to add driving under the influence to his résumé, Bieber has now found himself in the spotlight for a racial slur – by which I mean a ridiculous joke told by a child to a girl to impress her.

Whilst I do not condone his behaviour of late, or his appreciation of racial based jokes, I have to admit that the whole situation has been blown a little out of proportion. To top it off, further footage was then leaked showing Bieber warming up his vocals to a song he sings, bleeping out the lyrics and replacing them with derogatory references to a particular community. Granted that Bieber was just a sweet little girl in these two videos, you would think he would know better, but I pose the question; should he really have known better? Do grown adults today not still promote the very behaviour that Bieber has exhibited in these two videos?

There is no doubt that he could have better taste in jokes, but quite frankly the situation is ridiculous. Do we not have more pressing issues to bring to the worlds attention? Surely the world hasn’t become so pathetic that we find the need to fill our news hour with the plights of fallen Hollywood stars whose stints on the red carpet are now nothing but a distant memory.

Look around Bieber, do your research. If he was as racist a person as these videos make him out to be, do you not think the likes of Usher and Kenny Hamilton (Bieber’s head of security) would have brought him back down to earth? Reality check people, there’s more to life than what you see on your television.

What you ask is the moral to this story? Haters gonna hate.

– by Melissa Tonitto

2014-15 Cricket Guide for Dummies

Posted in Sports by

With a rather successful 2013-14 season of cricket for the Aussies the popularity and the attention on cricket in our nation has increased quite dramatically. With the BBL|03 having crazy ratings and all 5 Ashes Test Matches getting very high ratings as well the odds that many people don’t know whats going on has also increased. So for those Dummies out there here is just one of the things to expect next season!

-ICC Cricket World Cup 2015 –

Currently poised on top of the ICC ODI Team Rankings is Australia. Just behind in second place is India and in third place is England.

28 May 2014
Team Matches Points Rating
Australia 35 4020 115
India 53 5923 112
England 39 4329 111
Sri Lanka 57 6292 110
South Africa 32 3486 109
Pakistan 47 4716 100
New Zealand 31 3031 98
West Indies 40 3744 94
Bangladesh 23 1683 73
Zimbabwe 20 1228 61
Afghanistan 9 304 34
Ireland 9 297 33

Although Australia is clear ahead in terms of rating points, places second to 5th are each merely separated by 1 point. So anything could happen throughout the tournament. Rankings aside here are the players set to take the tournament by storm. Well actually since this is a Dummies Guide I will tone down my cricket terminology and rather make an Solstice Satisfaction’s ICC World Cup XI with explanations as to why I think they’re going to fire this time round in the World Cup.

Solstice Satisfaction’s ICC World Cup XI

1. Hashim Amla (South Africa)

-Solid Performer in all 3 formats. His timing and placement could pay dividends on quick Australian and New Zealand outfields. All you could ask from an opener.

2. Shikhar Dhawan (India)

-Had a fantastic 2013-14 Season. Top Run Scorer in the ICC Champions Trophy last year. Be ready for some

fireworks in the World Cup.

3. Virat Kohli (India)

-Like most players in this list, had a fantastic 2013-14 season. Against Australia in the 7 match ODI Series he performed at his best helping his side chase down massive totals of 350-60 with ease.

4. George Bailey (Australia) VICE CAPTAIN

-Last season he showed why Australia selectors had faith in him and anointed him with the T20I Captaincy and the ODI Vice Captaincy. In the ODI series against India he led by example and although they lost that series since then under Australia have won all ODI Series.

5. A.B De Villiers (South Africa)

-In the form of his life, both in the Test, ODI, and T20 arena. A solid performer for South Africa over the past few years and his experience and leadership qualities alongside his batting make him one of the most in-demand cricketer in the world.

6. Glenn Maxwell (Australia)

-In recent months he has shown why he is called the Big Show. His extravagant stroke-play and absolute dominance over any bowling unit once he has his eye in makes him one of the most deadly players currently playing international cricket. To add to his superb batting he is also a handy off spinner with the ability to get wickets in crucial times.

7. +MS Dhoni (India) CAPTAIN

-He’s done practically all you can achieve as captain. He’s won all the big tournaments and his keeping skills are as sharp as ever. In addition to his captaincy and keeping he is a deadly lower order finisher and a batsman you always want to get out early.

8. Chris Jordan (England)

-Most people wouldn’t know Chris Jordan but he his one of the few shining stars in the England Cricket Team at the moment. His deceptively quick bowling and his lower order striking are qualities you want in a limited overs player.

9. Mitchell Johnson (Australia) 

-Quick, aggressive and accurate. The three qualities you want in your repertoire of bowling options as captain. Not only is Mitchell Johnson’s bowling outstanding but he has the capability to clear the rope when required and his fielding is exceptional.

10. Dale Steyn (South Africa)

-One of the best fast bowlers in modern times and he has been dominating the player rankings for quite some time. He has the ability to swing the ball yet bowl at quite some pace. Like Johnson he has the ability to clear the boundary and is always one not worth taking lightly as an opposition.

11. Sunil Narine (West Indies)

-Along with his unusual action Sunil Narine has been deceiving many batsman at the crease with his off spin. Having a fantastic season both with the West Indies and KKR he has made himself renown around the world as a premier spin bowler that you want to have in any modern day bowling attack. Economical and deceptive he will be one of the lead player in the West Indies team.

12th Man. Eoin Morgan (England)

-His form in Australia in the ODI’s and T20I’s was quite phenomenal and his century at the GABBA personified how dangerous of a batsman he can be once he gets going. His past record in Australia and New Zealand make him a formidable batsman.

– by Hiro Couper

Dating Nikki: The “right time”

Posted in Dating Nikki, Lifestyle by

Dear Nikki,

I have been on a couple of dates with this guy that I really like. We’ve kissed and have had an enormous amount of chemistry. We’re going on our third date this weekend and I’m really nervous. I think he’s expecting us to have sex and I think it’d be best if I give it to him although I don’t think I’m ready. I’m worried he might leave me if I don’t give him what he wants. When do you think it is appropriate to have sex for a dating couple?  My friends have told me that having sex on the third date is “slutty” and that I should wait until I’m ready.

Please help!

Wishful Thinking Dater

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Dear Wishful Thinking Dater,

What is the “right time” to put out for a dating couple? To sum it up in five words: there is no right time.

Whenever you feel you’re ready to take that next step and give that part of you to him, go for it. Don’t feel pressured by him or your friends just because of what they will think of you regarding your decision. There is no set time limit for when you “have” to have sex. Don’t listen to all those sources that believe in the “second date rule” or even the “hold out until you’re married” rule. You do what is best for you. If you’re comfortable having sex on this third date, go for it. If you’d be more comfortable to have sex on the twentieth date, then do it on the twentieth date. Neither makes you slutty nor prudish; it just means you’re in charge of your body and you will do whatever the hell you want with it. Hell, people have sex on the first date, and that is perfectly okay. Everyone’s limits are different… no two human beings are the same!

If the bloke you’re seeing truly respects you and is ultimately the right man for you, he will respect your wishes and wait for whenever both of you are completely ready to take the plunge (sexual pun not intended at this time). If he tries to pressure you into doing things that you don’t want to, then dump his ass on the kerb because he ain’t the right man for you. Then again, he might not even be ready so you may be creating problems in your mind that aren’t even there.

Alternatively, if you are open-minded about doing some other raunchy things, set out some boundaries between you and your man if and when the time arises. By that, I don’t mean walk into your date and say “You can touch me down there with your fingers and that’s it… by the way, what’s for dinner?” When the situation gets hot and heavy, that’s when you bust out the limits. A true gentleman will respect that about you and will be more than happy to cater to your needs.

The moral of the story is this: you are in charge of your body and your womanly needs; not him, not your friends, not even good ol’ #DatingNoah here. Do it whenever you feel is right. When the right time comes along, I can assure you that your act of fornication will be that much more fantastic than if you did it when you weren’t too comfortable with your decision.

I hope this sets your mind at ease. Go out and have fun this weekend… and go the Broncos!

– by The Black Widow

If you have a question or need some good ol’ fashioned blunt advice from #DatingNikki, use the Contact page on our website and put in your comment “Subject: Dating Nikki” or alternatively send me an e-mail at widowslure@gmail.com and put “Dating Nikki” in the subject line. I will respond to your cries for help as soon as possible!