BUY: Lighthouse

The long-awaited sequel to The Heart Wants What It Wants has finally hit the digital shelves!

I’m very excited to release the sequel to my first novel entitled Lighthouse, featuring more antics from Devlin Blackthorn and Jase Morgan. Not to spoil the the ending of the first novel, but the sequel explores Devlin’s unique search for love.

Once again by the delicate hand of Vivienne Pintado.

For all vendors of the digital copy of the novel, you can find at this one universal link.

Purchase Lighthouse by Noah Malone

Happy reading!

For Spotify users, please enjoy this unofficial playlist while reading the book. It will definitely set the tone.

https://open.spotify.com/embed/user/1259455365/playlist/2j1nWTs3Rvw5d20r0E9dya

– by Noah La’ulu

Preview: Lighthouse

Jase and Devlin and the entire gang are back!

If you’ve read my debut novel The Heart Wants What It Wants and you are eagerly waiting for what happens next in the saga, then I have a treat for you! The sequel of the contemporary romance novel is set to release later this year and is entitled Lighthouse, and I’ve decided to share a portion of the first chapter for free! Just like the title of the first book made sense a bit into the story, Lighthouse will become clear as you read the sequel.

Now I should mention that if you choose to read further, there are OBVIOUS SPOILERS REGARDING THE FIRST BOOK of the series, so if you haven’t read The Heart Wants What It Wants and wish to, I highly suggest you don’t read any further. If you wish to purchase The Heart Wants What It Wants, follow this link for several e-book options.

The sequel to my debut novel will be released soon! Watch this space!

 

At the end of The Heart Wants What It Wants, Jase Morgan got his happy ending with Jordan McMahon, and Devlin Blackthorn wandered the world trying to find himself after suffering the heartbreak of his unrequited love. The friendship between the two main characters had been salvaged, but Devlin felt incomplete. After a drunken night in Las Vegas and one bad decision, Devlin found himself married to the arrogant and charming Atticus Brady. And this is where Lighthouse begins.

Similar to the format of The Heart Wants What It WantsLighthouse goes into a first person perspective of both of the main characters – Devlin Blackthorn and Atticus Brady. For the Jase fans, don’t worry; Prince Charming makes his presence well known in this sequel.

Without further ado, here is a sneak preview of Chapter One of Lighthouse! Enjoy!

Chapter 1

Devlin Blackthorn

Early-mid 2015…

 

I couldn’t imagine alcohol would be the cause of anything worse than last year – oh God, last year – but here I was, sitting in my apartment, staring at the impressive rock on my ring finger, wondering what the hell happened that fateful night in Las Vegas.

A handsome stranger – whom I admittedly despised from the get go – bought me a couple of drinks and after some very fuzzy details, I woke up next to him in bed legally married to him. Just another tragic wedding story to be added to Las Vegas’ archive.

If I needed a bigger slap in the face to stop drinking alcohol than almost losing my best friend, it was marrying someone I had only known for a few hours. Even though I was wrapped up on my warm bed in my sheets, I shivered. Married. I still didn’t know how to comprehend the fact that I was married.

Despite absolutely hating the idea of being married to someone I didn’t know – and I wasn’t exactly sure of his current whereabouts after leaving him in Vegas – I did quite like the ring he had chosen out for me. Sitting next to the more conservative platinum wedding band was a small yellow diamond surrounded by tiny, encrusted silver gems that complimented the modest, silver design; if it told me anything about my mysterious husband, it said that he had nice taste in jewellery, and a lot of money to irrationally spend on it.

I could barely make out the face of the man who had been lawfully wed to me in front of an Elvis impersonator and, God, I don’t even know who else. He was tall and handsome, with a lean, muscular build, and was arrogant as all hell. That’s all I could remember about Atticus.

Atticus…

Something told me I had to get used to that name for the foreseeable future. Well, of course I had to – he was my husband, after all.

I groaned out loud and sunk my head back into the soft cushioning of the pillow. I hadn’t told anyone of my Vegas wedding; not Jase, not Jordan, not my brother Garrett, not even my loyal confidante Monique. I could just imagine Jase’s reaction in my head, and it was enough to make me cringe.

“You what?!” he would shout at me. “Why on earth would you do something as careless and irresponsible as that? As a matter of fact, why were you drinking in the first place? You need to get your life together, Dev.”

I would be lying if I said a small part of me wasn’t still madly in love with Jase. In fact, I’d also be lying if I said a small part of me wasn’t about to use this surprise marriage as a way to show him that I was going to move on from him, as difficult as it was. The year 2014 had been hell for us, and I was glad that somehow, someway, we had come out of the other end of the tunnel barely functioning. I was going to let Jase live his life and hope that I would be in it as much as I was before.

Dwelling on my infatuation for Jase only briefly distracted me from my current situation. What on earth was I going to do?

I was sitting on my bed in Sydney, the evening before I was scheduled to move back to Velvet Springs, and this platinum circle was burning into my ring finger, reminding me of how awful my getaway escape had been. I couldn’t wait to get home and be in a familiar setting, even if it meant revealing to Jase what I had done in Vegas.

After having months off work, I couldn’t wait to get back into my writing at the Velvet Chronicle. Although the sport reporter position had been filled after my quick departure, Harvey, my editor and friend, had found a spot for me on the features team for the newspaper after my moderate amount of success in the same role at Isla Bordeaux magazine. I was fortunate enough to have this opportunity handed to me, but it certainly wasn’t the first thing on my mind right now.

There was a feint knock on my door and, sighing with relief, I got up to answer it. I had ordered a box of greasy cheese pizza to be delivered after I had finished packing; I wanted to spend my last night in the state’s capital with no regrets.

I fished the twenty-dollar note out of my back pocket and opened the door.

“Devlin?”

Oh. No. It couldn’t be… no. There was no way.

I panicked and bounced off the spot, throwing my fist out in an uncharacteristic knee-jerk reaction. The shot caught him on his eye and he let out a quick yelp of pain, but remained rooted to the ground.

I just Superman punched my husband.

“Atticus? What the f-”

“You seem surprised to see me,” he said, his brows furrowing in anger.

Watch this space. As soon as Lighthouse is released on various e-book platforms, Widow’s Lure will be the first to let you know!

– by Noah La’ulu

Why Something Borrowed Needs To Be Undone

I hate this movie so much. Like, don’t even get me started.

So I was sitting at home innocently minding my own business, when something reminded me of one of the worst experiences of my life. One day I took the time out of my busy schedule to sit down and watch Something Borrowed, and I regret it with every fibre of my being. I mean, Kate Hudson is on it (arguably my favourite actress of all time)… what could possibly go wrong?

If you hadn’t gathered by now, I hate this movie and everything went wrong. Well, no, that’s a lie. John Krasinski was lovely in this movie, but besides him, everything went wrong about this film. Not even Kate Hudson could save it.

And you know I hate it if I am dedicating an entire post on my blog to this piece of shit.

Let me catch you up to speed, and in case you want to punish yourself and watch it after reading this stinky review, then I must warn you that there are SPOILERS AHEAD REGARDING THIS HORRIBLE, HORRIBLE MOVIE.

This film actually needs to go fuck itself.

Something Borrowed is a shit romance film released in 2011 featuring Kate Hudson, John Krasinski, Ginnifer Goodwin and some other bloke… had to look his name up, and his name is Colin Egglesfield. It’s currently playing on Netflix which is where I was unfortunate enough to witness it. Basically, Ginnifer’s character Rachel is best friends with Hudson’s character Darcy, the latter of which is engaged to Egglesfield’s character Dex. Nekk minnit, Rachel is banging Dex and they continue to see each other and fall in love while Dex is soon to marry Darcy.

So far, Rachel and Dex are shitheads. Okay. We good?

Krasinski’s character Ethan meanwhile admits he has feelings for Rachel, but Rachel would rather be a homewrecking whore than date a completely available man who is also hella good looking so Rachel is like “Yeah nah aye”. Ethan finds out that Rachel is a slut and Dex is a scumbag, but agrees to keep their secret because he is a nice guy.

If you’re keeping score at home, Rachel and Dex are shitheads. And Ethan is a Godsend.

Throughout this entire film, you’re led to believe that Darcy is a bitch who is shown to be controlling and demanding over both Rachel and Dex. I don’t know if this is meant to make you sympathise with Rachel and Dex, but it didn’t work, because as we have established, they are both shitheads. So basically, instead of hating Darcy, you’re actually feeling for her because all of this is going on behind her back and she doesn’t know about it. Also, Kate Hudson is amazing.

Aaaaaand that doesn’t last long because it turns out that Darcy is cheating on Dex with his friend Marcus (played by Steve Howey) and doesn’t even care about it.

So that means Rachel, Dex AND Darcy are all shitheads. I guess Marcus could be added to that list as well. So we have four shitheads and Ethan.

But wait. It gets worse.

As Darcy is admitting that she is casually having an affair to her best friend, she finds Dex’s jacket in Rachel’s apartment, realises that Rachel is banging Dex and he is listening to their conversation, AND THEN has the nerve to breakdown and cry because her fiance is cheating on her with her best friend, even though she literally just admitted that she is also cheating. I love you Kate Hudson, but your character is a shithead.

But wait. There’s more.

Rachel and Dex don’t even really apologise. They’re just like “Yeah soz babe we love each other and we don’t love you so deal with it.” Dex and Darcy end it, and Darcy ends her friendship with Rachel. And neither of them don’t care because they found happiness in each other, the wankers. Darcy also ends up dating Marcus.

So basically everyone in this movie who is a shithead has a happy ending meanwhile the only likeable character played by John Krasinski ends up moving to London and remaining single in his sea of cheating friends.

The atrocity isn’t over yet. A flash forward reveals that Darcy is preggaz with Marcus’ baby but apparently isn’t with him anymore. And Rachel and Dex are still shitheads. And Darcy travels to London to try it with Ethan even though he is a lovely guy and she’s a piece of shit who is pregnant to a deadbeat who doesn’t even like her in the end.

If you have kept up with me thus far, then you should realise why I hate this film so much. The only character in this entire film that you have any sort of sympathy towards has a bad ending, while all the cheaters and liars and all around terrible people have happy endings. That is the only moral you can take from this film which, funnily enough, lacks any real morals.

Even if you look at this from an acting point of view, it’s still a terrible film. Despite decent performances from Hudson and Krasinski, this shitty shit fest still bombs to the point that I, a 24-year-old man, regret spending the approximate 112 minutes watching this piece of crap because I didn’t get anything of value out of it. Maybe besides visual gonorrhoea.

Tl;dr: Imagine being the only member of your friendship group who isn’t a lying cheating scumbag and being the only one without a happy ending = this film.

A Guide to Surviving the Night on Friday the 13th: The Game

Stop trying to make ki ki ki ma ma ma happen. It’s not going to happen.

If you’re a gamer of any kind – from casual to hardcore – it is assumed that you would’ve heard of the asymmetrical multiplayer survival horror game Friday the 13th: The Game. If not, let me quickly catch you up to speed. You’re teleported into the Friday the 13th film franchise, where a bunch of stereotype teenagers are innocently chilling by the campfire before Jason Voorhees finds them and kills unnamed camp counsellor, which causes the rest of the teenagers to run off and try to escape.

In this game, you will either take control of Jason, where your mission is to kill all of the teenagers before they either escape, or the game session times out; or you will take control of one of the counsellors, where your job is to either escape the campsite through various methods, or just hang on until the session ends. Because if 20 minutes runs out, Jason cannot harm you anymore. Ya know. Alternatively, it is is possible to kill Jason once and for all, but that requires a very specific procedure and teamwork. The session can have up to eight people, with one playing the role as killer. And before you ask, no. You cannot choose to be Jason. You’re randomly selected. Be sure to pay special attention the opening scene of any game session, as that may give you an idea of who is playing as Jason.

I prefer playing as a counsellor, but have dabbled as Jason and performed rather successfully as him. So if you’re thinking of buying this game, let me give you tips on how to play it well from both sides of the spectrum: as Jason, or as a Counsellor. Also as a bit of a sidenote, most of my experiences playing as a counsellor come from playing as “The Flirt” Tiffany Cox, so my gameplay experience might differ from someone else’s. But generally speaking, my counsellor tips will apply to whomever you choose to be.

Playing as Jason
– First off the bat, when you spawn as Jason in the creepy shack with your dead mother’s head next to her sweater, what you want to do is teleport to an area where you know counsellors would have spawned. In Higgins Haven, it’s best to spawn right next to the main cabin itself, as at least one or two players tend to spawn near there. In Packanack, same thing. Teleport straight to the main lodge, and you will find a bunch of counsellors there. In Camp Crystal Lake, this one’s a touch more difficult as there is no “main cabin” so to speak, but a couple of players tend to spawn near the archery deck and the garage, so a safe bet is to go there straight away.
– As most horror movies would suggest, picking them off one by one is easier than trying to take on a whole group. If you see a group of counsellors, they can easily overwhelm you, so start off by targeting one who is running on their lonesome.
– Take out the electrical boxes as soon as you possibly can. They can incite fear into the counsellors, but also prevent them from calling Tommy Jarvis, and from calling the cops.
– On your map as Jason, it tells you where the phone to call the cops is, and also where the car(s) and boat are. Be sure to keep an eye on all of these. Teleport frequently between these locations in case you catch any of those cheeky counsellors trying to install batteries, pour in gas, or attach boat propellers.
– If a counsellor enters Jason’s shack, the voice of Pamela Voorhees will alert you. You have two options, although I mostly recommend the former: a) teleport straight away to the shack and stop whoever is in there from stealing Pamela’s sweater, or b) stay exactly where you are and keep an eye on the map, as someone could be entering the shack to distract you from a car load of people about to leave the site.
– While grab kills are much more fun to watch (is that terrible of me to say?), those pesky pocket knives can be a burden to you as Jason. This may be frowned upon among FT13 players, but weakening the counsellors to the point where they can no longer run is hugely beneficial to you. You can then follow that up by straight swinging your weapon of choice and murdering them, or you could try your luck and grab them for the ultimate finale.
– If you’re mic’d up as Jason and choose to play a stealthier option, mute your mic. If your dog is barking or mum is yelling at you to take the rubbish out, the players near you will be able to hear it and can sprint away from you without giving away their location. If you’re muted, then you have a better chance of killing the counsellors. Team this method up with Jason’s stealth ability, and you’re good to go.
– Furthermore, if the counsellors are using mics, listen to them talk to each other. Most of the time, they’ll unintentionally give away someone else’s location, or their current plan of action, so you can fool their plan before they have the chance to execute it.

Playing as a Counsellor
– TEAM UP! You’re placed on a team as a reason, and it’s nearly impossible to skip solely on your own efforts. Work together, and balance out your counsellor’s weaknesses with someone else’s strengths. For example, Tiffany cannot repair to save her life, but she is stealthy and has great stamina. Find a car or boat part, run it to the location, leave it at the vehicle, and alert someone with a “smarter” character that the part is ready to be installed.
– DO NOT PURPOSELY BETRAY ONE ANOTHER. You’re a dickhead if you do. That’s all.
– While staying in groups works against you stealthy wise, it is hard for Jason to pick you off if you stand in solidarity. If Jason picks up a fellow counsellor, quickly hit him with your weapon and he is forced to drop your teammate.
– Try to carry a pocket knife, fireworks and a first aid spray where possible. If you find doubles of an item, pick it up and leave it at a central location for another team member to collect eg: near a car or boat, or near the main cabin of the map (read above).
– If possible, pick a weapon that would be useful to you. There is a reason there seem to be thousands of wrenches scattered in the map, and that’s because they suck. Shotguns and flare guns work well, with the latter also alerting everyone on the map where Jason is when fired. As melee weapons are concerned, you’re in good hands if you have a machete or a baseball bat.
– Communication is key. If you have a mic, speak to your teammates to try and organise an escape plan. If you find an important car or boat part, alert everyone on the team through your walkie talkie (if you have one) and someone may escort you there in case that annoying Jason finds you.
– For the love of all that is holy, if you are being chased by Jason, DO NOT lead him to someone else. Not only have you gotten yourself in trouble, you have now jeopardised the life of someone else. Try and keep him distracted, and if you desperately need help, ask someone to come and help you. Don’t just assume they will want to be on Jason’s radar just to save your life.
– Read each other’s game plan. What I mean by this is if you can see your team are brutalising Jason to the point where his mask has fallen off, it’s safe to say they are attempting to kill Jason. If you see this (and you are playing as a female character and no one else has already done so), run to Jason’s shack, steal Pamela’s sweater, and join your friends so you can deliver the final blow.

I bought this game the day it came out, and still currently play it religiously because it’s that much fun. I hope you can also enjoy it, because it’s worth the money. Especially now because most of the glitches that tarnished the game upon release have gone adios.

– by Noah La’ulu