Tag Archives: Queer

Six Facts About Pride Month

Posted in Lifestyle by

Wow, a listicle… and during Pride Month?!

(In fairness, I could be using that a lot more than I have been this June.)

Hello Widow’s Lureans! Wherever you are in the world, I hope you are all enjoying Pride Month, whether you are a part of the Alphabet Mafia, a proud ally, or just a quiet bystander.

It would be remiss of me not to touch on Pride Month as a proud B, Q and T of the LGBTQIA+. And instead of taking a fairly serious toned but still informative point of view like I did in 2024, I thought I’d take a more light-hearted but still checking your nonsense kind of tone in 2026.

So with that being said, here are six facts about Pride Month, compiled by yours truly.

1. Pride doesn’t exist to wipe out the cishets
This is the most tiring ‘argument’ I see whenever Pride Month rolls around. All of a sudden Larry the cishet white man – a subgenre of human that has been severely underrepresented in modern media, clearly – complains “What about Straight Pride? Where’s my Straight Pride parade? Should I be ashamed for being attracted to the opposite gender?” No you shouldn’t Larry. You should be ashamed for having a pea-sized brain, however. Pride exists because for decades, anyone outside of the cishet normality was shunned, crucified, persecuted and even jailed for simply existing as they are. The first brick was thrown at Stonewall because we were tired of living in the shadows and having to pretend to be someone we weren’t simply because of societal norms. Pride exists so that we can embrace who we are. Not everything revolves around you, Larry.

2. Men’s Mental Health Month can exist alongside Pride Month (shocker!)
Another tiring argument I see is “What about Men’s Mental Health Month?” Are you aware that two things can exist at the same time exclusive of each other? What a novel concept! If I can share the same birthday with my aunt, then Men’s Mental Health Month can share the same month as Pride Month. Although I think it’s super funny how these people harp on about men’s mental health yet when someone like Kane Evans shares his deeply moving and personal coming out story, all of a sudden their care for men’s mental health goes out the window and they start ridiculing him. Funny that.

3. Pride won’t turn your kids gay or trans
There goes a tale that should you look in the sun and see a rainbow, suddenly you will experience gender dysphoria and a sudden attraction to the same gender. Okay but seriously, if you believe in this and ‘the rainbow flag propaganda’, let me know what area you live in so I can point you towards the nearest library. Because that is NOT how LGBTQIA+ works. One phrase I see that I love, and bear with me while I paraphrase this, is “Pride doesn’t exist to turn your kids into gay kids. It exists so your kids don’t turn into dead kids.” LGBTQIA+ kids are four times more likely to attempt suicide than their cishet counterparts (source), which is a terrible fact. Pride exists so that these kids can love and embrace who they are so they can live longer and happier lives and not be forced into a closet or repression that could lead to them making some permanent choices. Again, not everything revolves around you, Larry.

4. Pride is for everyone*
This could be a potentially controversial opinion but I believe that pride and celebrating pride is for everyone – including the cishets. By that, I mean if Samantha the cishet ally wants to celebrate pride and embrace all of her LGBTQIA+ friends and family, then Pride is as much for Samantha as it is any member of the Rainbow Army. Don’t gatekeep pride for people who are genuine supporters of the community, especially at a time like this where our mere existence is being politically debated. So if you see Pride Month advertising and you as a cishet think “What can I do to celebrate Pride?” You can reach out to your queer friends and peers, check in on them, remind them that they are seen and loved and you have their backs. *Pride is not for the LGB without the T crowd. You shouldn’t be proud of who you are, because who you are is a horrible person who lacks critical thinking.

5. The B is still as valid as every other letter
If there’s one thing I hate nearly as much as I hate the “LGB without the T” crowd of half-wit morons, it’s those who try to shame or gatekeep Pride from bi, pan or queer folk in hetero presenting relationships. Delancey the bisexual woman married to her Golden Retriever husband deserves to be here as much as anyone else. The queerness in her doesn’t automatically disappear because she fell in love with and married someone of the opposite sex. Fuck outta here with your nonsense.

6. We just want to exist safely
If you think that Pride is just some leftist propaganda to turn everyone queer, then I’ll hold back my usual sassiness to hit you with this very important fact I touched on in number one – we just want to live our lives free of persecution, judgment or discrimination. That’s the main reason Pride exists. A same sex couple holding hands walking down the street is guaranteed to be met with a different and colder reception than a hetero couple; a trans woman simply existing in a dress is guaranteed to irk some small-minded folks; an ace-aro is guaranteed to heave a sigh as they have to explain to someone for the 1000th why they want to be alone. You don’t have to understand every letter and every aspect of LGBTQIA+, but what you can do is offer simple grace and compassion and realise that “Hey, I might not understand it all, but I acknowledge they’re human and they deserve the right to live the way they want”. That’s it.

I’m going to end this Pride themed piece with five very choice words that I want you to take away from this…

Fuck Riley Gaines, dumb bitch.

Happy Pride!

– by The Black Widow

Three Things I Learned About Myself While Filming Heel Turn

Posted in Entertainment, Lifestyle, Movies by

And now for a self-indulgent post.

Hello Widow’s Lureans. I know I’m super inconsistent with posting on here, but it’s actually a goal on my vision board to write more and post more on here. So to quickly catch you up to speed on the past couple of years of my life:

– My parents have been living in Fiji for the past three years, which means I’ve been living in their house rent free so I could save more spend more money on clothes and beauty. Nikki maintenance is very expensive.
– Still at the same job which I enjoy most of the time.
– Still wrestling, still slaying in the ring and out. Still paired with my soulsister Frankie B, while also exploring solo opportunities as well.
– Had a crew film a documentary on me which premiered at the Mardi Gras Film Festival 2026 and was a hit with the people in attendance.

Just a casual documentary. You know, no biggie.

Talk about length. Talk about drama. Talk about stones. Talk about comfort.

The aptly named Heel Turn focuses on myself and how I navigate the wrestling world as a queer transwoman of colour and how wrestling has helped and harmed me. But specifically, how I play a villainous character (heel) when society villainises parts of my identity that I can’t control anyway.

Over three separate days of filming (training at the PWA Academy, performing on a show in a match against Cosmo Cooper, and capturing some moments of me at my home), the wonderful crew worked with me to capture the real moments that show public Nikki and the vulnerable Nikki all wrapped up in an eight minute short film/documentary. Not only did I show them Nikki Van Blair, the ultra glamorous, confidently sexual and magnetically bitchy Queen Bee, but they also interviewed the somewhat serious, outspoken and unapologetic Nikki Hamilton, and in those moments, I found that I learned a few things about myself that I wasn’t consciously aware of before. I’m very intrigued by the psychology of humans and how everyone is fundamentally different from each other, and as someone who is as self-reflective as me – some would say I am too self-reflective –  I love discovering new things about myself, why I do things the way I do, and why I react to things the way I do.

So as an interesting thought piece, I wanted to share a few things with you that I learned about myself during or after the filming of Heel Turn with this fabulous crew.

1. I don’t have emotional walls built up; I have a door that I control.
We all know the saying that someone has walls built up to protect themselves from getting hurt. These walls can be beneficial, but in turn it stops people from getting to know the real you. I participated in a podcast interview for LGBT In the Ring with the director of the film Isabella, and she made a comment that I have a wall built up. I understand why she came to that conclusion because I know I do have a very noticeable public persona, but I respectfully disagree with her labelling. I don’t have a wall that people need to chip down or hurdle over; I have a door that I willfully control, and I can freely let people who deserve it into my inner thoughts and feelings and become vulnerable with them if and when I choose to. This documentary wouldn’t have worked if I refused to get raw and real with the team, and I found it easy to not only show them the Queen Bee, but also the woman who walks through life and navigates the wrestling world carrying an invisible burden through spaces that no one else has to think about. And that’s because I control that door, and I control that door handle.

2. I watch way too much Real Housewives
Now I’m very aware that I watch too much Real Housewives, but the actual point I want to make here is new to me. There is a point where the crew asked me how I felt after planning my match with Cooper, and by all means it was an easy and seamless experience as Cooper is great at what he does, he’s a professional, and I trust him not only as an opponent but as a friend as well. But because watching rich women scream at dinners has become second-nature to me, and knowing what they have to do as part of their job to create drama and entertainment, I brought up a small point of contention to the cameras between Cooper and I during the planning conversation. This was not fake or ‘produced’ in any way as it was something that I had genuinely felt in the moment. However, it was such a small thing to note that not mentioning it would’ve honestly sufficed, but because I’m a Bravo-holic, I brought it up. Because I know what makes good TV. Thank you Tamra Judge.

3. My story in wrestling is a lot more interesting than I originally thought, and is one that needs to be told
I feel like everyone can relate to this. Because I am living my own life in real time and experience everything I experience, none of it seems overly fascinating or interesting to me since it’s all real to me. But talking to the crew about everything in my life, personally and professionally in wrestling, and them being so fascinated with the everyday workings of my life, actually made me realise that my story is interesting. Not only that, but verbally coming to the realisation with the crew that I’ve knocked down a lot of doors for future queer folk in Aus wrestling, helped me realise that my story is a story that needs to be told. Because who doesn’t like a real story of someone who has to fight through discrimination, invisible walls, and moving through spaces with an extra weight on their shoulders, and creating a legacy for others to catapult off, because in reality that’s what I’m doing, and it’s incredibly humbling to realise.

I know that I take a lot of time to look within myself and self reflect, again some might say that I do that too much, but making these realisations about myself during or after the filming of the documentary have helped me to understand myself more and acknowledge that my journey in Australian professional wrestling is full of unchartered waters and untrodden path that will helpfully make it easier for future wrestlers of all the tribes that I proudly represent – Pacific Islanders, LGBTQIA+, women.

While the Mardi Gras Film Festival – and its on demand service – has ended, Heel Turn might be popping up in new online places, so keep your eyes and ears out because this short film will make you laugh, make you reflect, and might even make you cry. If I dare say so myself.

And you might even learn a new thing or two about me after watching it.

– by The Black Widow

What Pride Means To Me

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It’s Pride season, bitches!

The month of June marks the start of a few things: it’s the start of a freezing cold Winter (in Australia, at least); and it also means that it’s officially Pride month!

The rainbow capitalism of it all would suggest that Pride month is just “gay month” where people wear ostentatious rainbow badges, socks, or outfits, and talk about how queer they are.

While I think both of those things are important to the representation of Pride month, that doesn’t even begin to cover what this month is really about.

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To me, Pride was born because of the many years that queer folk experienced where they were forced ‘into the closet’ because society dictated that they should not be proud of their queerness or who they are as people.

Pride exists, not only as a celebration of being queer which I think is a super important part of Pride month, but because the people under the LGBTQIA+ rainbow umbrella deserve the right to exist in this world without persecution.

Pride exists because if our generation can celebrate embracing our gender identity and sexual orientation, then the younger generations who may be questioning their identity will see that there’s nothing wrong with being attracted to the same gender, or realising that they’re not on the gender binary.

Pride exists to provide a safe space for those who may be ostracised from their family or friends, or for someone who’s deep in the closet but longs for a life where they can be with the person they love without fear of judgment or ridicule.

To me, Pride is obviously for the queer folk to celebrate who they are, but also exists as a reminder for everyone in general to embrace their true selves and love every aspect of themselves, whether it’s their gender identity, sexual orientation, or even other aspects of who they are like their race and cultural background, etc.

This Pride month, I want you to take some quiet time to yourself to sit back, think about all the wonderful aspects that make you truly you, and be proud of who you are and how far you’ve come in your life journey.

And if you are not ready to publicly embrace these parts of yourself, then that’s totally okay! When you’re ready, the Rainbow Army will be here to hold your hand, walk beside you, and guide you in your next step to living your true, authentic life.

Happy Pride month everyone! Love who you love, and most importantly, love who you are.

– by The Black Widow