Satisfashion: Split Leg Jeans

Posted in Lifestyle, Satisfashion by

I’m not going to lie; if I were suffering from insomnia and badly wanted to go to sleep, I’d watch a fashion show. They bore me to tears. I have little to zero interest in the fashion industry but, hey, everyone is programmed differently and I don’t hold anything against those who are expert fashionistas.

In saying that, I’d like to think that I have a good style myself and can put together a pretty decent outfit for myself and for others. One of the things I enjoy most at my job is styling clueless men who have no idea how to put together an outfit and after dealing with me, leave with some good buys.

Anywho, here’s to introducing my new fashion portion of my blog, deftly titled “Satisfashion”. Geddit? Geddit?

Here is today’s fashion curiosity:
The Split Leg Jean

They're a sight for sore eyes, aren't they?

They’re a sight for sore eyes, aren’t they?

For the sake of argument, I’m going to specifically refer to black and red split leg jeans.

So, if you can’t see, split leg jeans are a type of pant where one leg is one colour and the other leg is another colour. It’s an interesting concept and a very tricky garment to pull off. But that’s why I’m here to help you.

I know the general idea of constructing an outfit is to revolve the clothes around the shoes, but in split leg jeans, that’s not the case. You have to revolve your whole outfit around dem jeans if you want to make the outfit work. You want the central point of the outfit to be the jeans so if you wear something else that detracts attention from your outrageous jeans, well, that’s an issue.

For starters, you’re going to have to base the colour choices around your jeans. For me, I stuck to a basic black, red and white colour combination to compliment my jeans. I wore a white shirt with black and red decal on the front, a black cardigan on top and a red neck bandanna for extra sass. For some strange reason, I find comfort in having something on top of my head and sunnies tend to do that trick, so I even had black sunglasses on.

The tricky part is “what colour shoes am I going to wear with this? Do I go black or do I go red?” Why not be bold and do both – if it works.  If you have one red Doc Marten and one black canvas slip on shoe, chances are high that you will look stupid if you don them together. What I chose to wear was one black Converse shoe on the red leg and one red Converse on the black leg to create an eye-catching harlequin/court jester type image. If you don’t have the materials to do this, however, I would suggest a pair of black shoes. Wearing a red shoe on the red leg may look too red while a black shoe with a black leg is passable. I know that sounds silly, but trust me.

Here’s what I had:

Split leg jean swag!

Split leg jean swag!

Pulled off like a champion, methinks.

If I think fashion is going the way I think it’s going to do, split leg jeans are going to become a huge hit in the near future, so I suggest you pop on over to places that sell split leg jeans or even split leg shorts and buy yourself a pair. They’re sure to be a hit at the next event or party you have to attend.

– by The Black Widow

Review: Fifty Shades of Grey

Posted in Books, Entertainment by

I know I’m about two years late on the Fifty Shades bandwagon, but I finally found the time and motivation to read it. It was always one of those things I was “going to get around to eventually”, except this time I actually got around to it. Anyway, I just finished it and am therefore going to review it.

Fifty Shades of Grey, the first in the series trilogy.

Fifty Shades of Grey, the first in the series trilogy.

If you are in the percentage that hasn’t read this book, allow me to introduce you to Anastasia Steele and Christian Grey, the female and male protagonists in this romance novel/series, although I’m not too sure if the word “romance” is the right word for it. Fifty Shades of Grey puts the reader into the perspective of Anastasia, a twenty-something just-about-to-graduate college student who gets thrown into an interview with the dark and alluring Grey which pretty much sets off the following chain events.

I’m just going to say it – I felt absolutely no connection with the characters whatsoever until the very ending, which I won’t recount in case of spoiling the events of anyone reading this. I found Anastasia to be really irritating and generic; I’ve read many o’ book of female protagonists who aren’t confident and aren’t “sure of themselves”. I also found her to be an unrealistic portrayal of a woman who falls in love with a man five minutes after meeting him. Anastasia brought nothing new to me in that aspect. When it comes to Christian, I think the general consensus was that the reader is supposed to swoon over him, but swoon I did not. I found him to be quite repulsive and if I were to encounter him, given he were a real person, I’d probably kick him in the pants.

The way it was written was both sophisticated and annoying. The use of language in this novel was smart and intelligent and sometimes even witty. The writing was engaging in that it kept me wanting more and more. In saying that, there were times when it felt like big words were used just for the sake of sounding smart and throwing big words into the mix. One thing that college has taught me is that, despite there being several words and ways one can write “She said, she said, she said,” it’s best not to stray too much. Fifty Shades of Grey didn’t follow that method, however, with a lot of uses of other words like cajoled, which was used several times.

One part of the writing that irritated me no further was the constant reference to Ana’s subconscious and her “inner Goddess”. At first, it was pretty funny seeing what both of these entities thought of Ana’s shenanigans, but when they were both brought up time and time again, it was a bit tiring.

The storyline was interesting to say the least. If I may make an Anchorman reference… “well that escalated quickly”. That’s the most I can say about that without spoiling too much so I will go no further.

Solst-o-meter
Storyline: 7.0/10
Style of writing: 5.4/10
Overall: 5.8/10

All in all, while it was a book I couldn’t for the life of me put down, I was pretty disappointed with it. I didn’t empathise with the characters and the writing wasn’t enthralling. The storyline was probably the saving light of this novel, it being the only really interesting part of the story. However, I will be eagerly hunting down the sequel as I am dying to know what happens with Anastasia and Christian next.

– by The Black Widow

Tipping for Dummies: Round 23

Posted in Sports by

The finals are literally around the corner and the entire NRL world are holding their breath… figuratively speaking, I hope, I don’t want anyone passing out just because I told them to. There are five teams who are definitely going to make the finals, which means there are three spots left up for grabs! Alas… welcome to Tipping for Dummies, Round 23!

Everybody's favourite "Tipping for Dummies!"

Everybody’s favourite “Tipping for Dummies!”

SolSat’s Prediction Count from Round 22: 6 out of 8 (75%)

Same as last week, really. I would say “Way to fail me, Doggies” but really, the referees were clearly against them in that game. Poor Josh Reynolds… bugger was so worked up about the unfair ruling.

Friday 16th August, 2013
Brisbane Broncos vs. Parramatta Eels
The mighty Bronx take on the opposite-of-mighty Eels in the Round 23. Injury hit Round 22 hard and one of the teams to feel that are the Broncos who lose star player Hodges. The Eels, however, gained their star player in Jarryd Hayne. Will this affect the outcome of an otherwise easily predicted game?

SolSat’s Prediction: Brisbane Broncos

My Broncos are hungrier than ever for victory as shown in their previous few matches. They know that their finals dreams are disappearing and to keep that alive, they have to keep on truckin’. With Stagg in the centre, who has won a premiership in that position, I think the Broncos will do just fine with Hodges sidelined.

South Sydney Rabbitohs vs. Manly-Warringah Sea Eagles
The Bunnies have been in terrible form without Inglis in the past couple of weeks so, luckily for them, the big GI is returning in Round 23 alongside Bunnies key player John Sutton. With big man Watmough injured, impressive rookie Justin Horo will return to the starting lineup as Manly fans hope that this will lead them to victory.

SolSat’s Prediction: South Sydney Rabbitohs

Tentatively, I am backing the Bunnies in this one. Surely the shining light in Inglis and Sutton’s returns will ignite the fire and get the Bunnies back in top form because, quite frankly, their previous performances have been embarrassing. These two teams are top contenders for the premiership so this one is bound to be stellar.

Saturday 17th August, 2013
Canberra Raiders vs. Canterbury Bulldogs
The Raiders, despite losing last week against the Chooks, put on an excellent performance which was an upgrade on their Round 21 shocker. The Doggies are coming off a pretty big upset as they were toppled by the Titans. In my opinion, the Doggies were cheated; the officiating in that game was bad. Either way, this one is looking to be pretty evenly matched.

SolSat’s Prediction: Canberra Raiders

I am strangely backing the unlikely horse as I am predicting a Raiders win in this one. With Barba’s Bulldogs future in heavy doubt, the Doggies backs are in need of a huge makeover as they haven’t been playing too well recently without him. The Raiders form fluctuates – one week their bad, the next week their good. I am expecting a two-good-week streak from them.

North Queensland Cowboys vs. Gold Coast Titans
Two Queensland teams lock horns as the Cowboys clash with the Titans. Both teams have stepped up their game recently as they are looking to lock in their position in the top 8. With both teams making no changes to the bench, this is bound to be an all-out classic.

SolSat’s Prediction: North Queensland Cowboys

The Cowboys were in celestial (you read right, celestial) form last week with a 32 point victory over the Panthers. The Titans also pulled out a great victory with Aidan Sezer setting up most of their impressive plays. However, the Titans seem comfortable and the Cowboys are hungry… the Cowboys will win this one, only by just.

St. George Illawarra Dragons vs. Cronulla Sharks
Good news for the Sharks – funny guy Beau Ryan has finally returned… along with Anthony Tupou. One notable change on the Dragons side is almost-as-funny-guy Jack de Belin starting as Lock. The Dragons haven’t had a good season. Can they look to defeat the Sharks in this one?

SolSat’s Prediction: Cronulla Sharks

The Sharks side was hurt with the multiple injuries that tarnished their form, so with their recent returns, the Sharks have stepped up their game and will defeat the Dragons. Just so I have something nice to say about the Dragons, I am expecting a great season from them next year!

Sunday 18th August, 2013
Newcastle Knights vs. Melbourne Storm
Speaking of the Sharks, they had a close one last week against the Knights who just managed to pull out the victory. Special mention going to Danny Buderus on his milestone game last week with the Knights. The Storm, on the other hand, skipped around the Bunnies terrible defense last week. These two victorious teams are looking to continue their winning streak.

SolSat’s Prediction: Melbourne Storm

The Storm seem to be over their surprising losing streak… or not streak, whatever you want to call it. Their mission is simple: reclaim the Telstra Premiership for 2013, and they’re doing a very good job at it. The Knights will put up a good fight though.

New Zealand Warriors vs. Penrith Panthers
Also playing on the serene Sunday are the Warriors who are set to collide with the Penrith Panthers. Both of these teams were on the losing end last round; with the Panthers, SolSat favourite Josh Mansour played absolutely terrible. If the Panthers want to reverse their luck in this round, all of them will have to step up their game as they go against the Warriors.

SolSat’s Prediction: New Zealand Warriors

I’m going with the Warriors in this one. They pull out these shockingly amazing victories and the Panthers just aren’t up to scratch; they hit their form climax already and I don’t see them defeating the Warriors in this round, sadly enough. Here’s to a good game between both sides, however.

Monday 19th August, 2013
West Tigers vs. Sydney City Roosters
Great news for the Tigers: their captain Robbie Farah has officially re-signed with the Tigers (as opposed to resigned… grammar saves lives). However, they have the toughest challenge ahead for them as they take on the no#1 Chookies. The Tigers are hoping the good news of securing Farah to their squad plus the homefield advantage will lead them to victory.

SolSat’s Prediction: Sydney City Roosters

No offense to the Tigers but this one’s a no brainer: it’s team no#1 vs. team #15. I expect the Roosters to win this one with ease. That’s all I have to say about that really.

I’m hoping for a solid weekend of footy action that I may or may not keep an eye on – my nephew’s here from Brisbane and I plan on following him around for the entire weekend. It’s rare that I get to spend time with my handsome 10 month old nephew so I’m going to make the most of it.

– by The Black Widow

It’s the Little Things

Posted in Lifestyle by

Living in such a fast-paced, busy world, it’s bound to happen that the small things that make your life so much better will go unnoticed. An alarm, for example, is a lifesaver – if it weren’t for that annoying sound constantly going off until you whack the button to tell it to shutup, I would guess that 98% of people in the world would have lost their job ages ago.

Because really, how good is toothpaste!

Because really, how good is toothpaste!

I’m quite hippy in the fact that I like to take the time out of my day to stop and appreciate the small things in my life that make it so breezy; I don’t do it as often as one should, but I’m only human with a much busier schedule than I’m used to.

This one instance I always refer back to was one day when I woke up – as usual – took a shower – as usual – and then went to brush my teeth. I had a different toothpaste than what I’m used to so, without too much thinking, I used it. Can I just say that it was the most amazing toothpaste that I have ever used? It had those little breath strip things within the toothpaste and it just done its job so well and much, much more. The usage of this amazing toothpaste literally made my day so much better than it would have been if I had used my normal, boring toothpaste.

Without spending too much time writing about the intricacies of toothpaste, instead of pondering about these little things, I decided to write something about it and name a few inventions and other tidbits that make my life so fantastical.

Drive-thru
I was getting Maccas the other night for dinner because I couldn’t be arsed to cook myself anything, and I was sitting in the drive-thru line which was pretty packed. I could see in my rear view mirror that the person behind me was getting rather impatient and here I was sitting there quite calm and reserved. Why? Imagine if there was no such thing as drive-thru and you had to get out of your car to get your fast food just to get back into the car and drive back home. Like, who has the time for that? Drive-thru is also handy for people like me who tend to drive half-naked so it saves you from getting out of the car. I get that I am praising an invention that was designed to make lazy people even lazier, but still, it’s handy, no?

Skype and other video call technologies
My brother, sister-in-law and nephew live in Brisbane, my oldest sister lives in New Zealand and one of my best friends is currently touring Europe by herself. While phone calls, Facebook messages and other forms of textual communication come in handy, there is nothing better than hearing them speak whilst having visual images to support that. I for one am so glad that Skype was invented so I get to see how big my nephew is getting without him actually being there and the opportunity to chat to my sister about pointless things.

Car phone chargers
I depend on my smartphone as much as everyone else does, maybe even more. So when I went to Hunter Valley for CMC Rocks for 3 days – which was absolutely amazing, by the way – I had to face the dilemma of ‘how exactly was I going to keep my phone charged, in a camp site, with no apparent method of charging’. The solution was simple once I thought about it – I sat in my car with the engine turned on to charge my phone. While I looked anti-social and somewhat materialistic, at least I had a way of documenting my time at CMC Rocks with pictures, notes and phone calls to my family.

Da Police
One thing I am absolutely sick of are people complaining about the police. Yes, there are some shady police workers out there, but there are shady workers in every work industry. It’s bound to happen. Human beings aren’t perfect. So when I see people complain about the efforts of police or the ethics of police, I sit there and think ‘Sure, that’s all fine and dandy, but if you have a teenage daughter who comes running to you saying that she was raped, who are you going to go to for help?’ Unless you’re Batman, you’re going to go the police you just damned for eating donuts on their well deserved break.

Clothes hangers
No one necessarily cares about clothes hangers… until you need them. Nekk minnit, you’re running around like a headless chook looking for spare hangers. As a compulsive shopper with an overflowing wardrobe, one can never have too many clothes hangers. Unless you’re perfectly fine with leaving your nicely ironed clothes on the floor in a messy-folded heap.

I could go on and on and point out more little tidbits in life that make the world a better place, but you’d be here for days. I implore you SolSat readers to stop and smell the daisies, for lack of a better phrase. It may even make your outlook in life way more positive.

– by The Black Widow