Tag Archives: corey parker

Why I Don’t Support Kim Kardashian

Posted in Entertainment, Opinion by

Last week, Kim Kardashian attempted to break the internet with a couple of naked pictures. Little did she know, my internet was working fine with no faulty connections.

If you ask me in person whether or not I like the Kardashians or anyone commonly associated with that family, I would express my feelings with very colourful language and the fact that I do not like them will be made very clear. As this will be published online, however, I do have to express myself in a more calm and fair manner.

From my limited marketing knowledge, Kim Kardashian as a brand is successful. Her face is plastered everywhere, her products are doing swimmingly well, and she makes it on the front page of tabloids for merely licking an envelope. However, Kim Kardashian as a person, I don’t believe she can claim any success whatsoever.

Did anyone's internet actually stop working?

Did anyone’s internet actually stop working?

To my knowledge, she was first introduced to the world of celebrity for being Paris Hilton’s lap dog and part-time slave, and then her and Ray J (who, if you asked me what song he sung, I wouldn’t be able to name one) decided to make a sex tape complete with horrid fake noises, and then her and her family decided to make a reality show of their drama-filled lives which I personally do not envy in the slightest, and then there were “those pictures“.

With all of the things that I’ve mentioned above – granted I have missed out portions of her life – where does “talent” come into play? For me, as a journalist-in-the-rise, the only way I would want to be a household name is if it were attached to my skill as a writer or a content producer. Not because I’m really good at taking my clothes off, or I dated someone who was famous and now all of a sudden people are following me.

In that same vein, I can’t put her husband in the same boat. As much as I dislike Kanye for his attitude and superior God complex, the man is talented. As heck.

I don’t see the talent in following a hotel heiress around, doing everything she asks, and I don’t see the talent in recording a sex tape. (Unless you manage to hold the camera for the entire duration and not make it awkwardly shake… that would be talent.)

We as a society have gone from idolising true legends of cinema like Grace Kelly and awe-inspiring musicians like Elvis Presley, to girls with nice bodies who take nude photos for a magazine. If this one sentence doesn’t illustrate the entire point of this article, then I have failed as a blogging journalist.

I’m not trying to shade those who do support Kim Kardashian. I say “to each their own” and have at it. I would just prefer to use my time idolising someone who is great at what they do and is also a decent person like Brisbane Broncos’ Corey Parker, for example, than someone who’s in the spotlight for no apparent reason other than she is Kim Kardashian.

Let’s not beat around the bush. If you had to list four talents Kim Kardashian has shown during her time in the spotlight, you’d be hard pressed to name even a couple. It’s kind of sad how society’s views of admiration are diminishing so that seemingly pointless celebrities like her are gaining a cult following.

Oh well. I’ll just sit here and quietly admire the likes of Elvis Costello and Billie Piper. Y’all can have the Kardashian family.

– by The Black Widow

What We Learned in Origin 2014

Posted in Sports by

The biggest sporting series in Australia is now over.

State of Origin 2014 saw angry words thrown around, dodgy calls made by the refs, butterfingers dropping balls at the most crucial times, and people not seeing a pass being thrown at them. Oh, and Oscar winning “injury” performances from players.

But if there are a few specific things that we have learned over the Origin series, these would be it:

(DISCLAIMER: As a loyal Queensland supporter, I will try my darndest to be as liberal as possible regarding the situation)

Because if anyone was going to be the thumbnail of this piece, it was Cozza. (SOURCE: Queensland Maroons Facebook page)

Because if anyone was going to be the thumbnail of this piece, it was Cozza. (SOURCE: Queensland Maroons Facebook page)


1. Corey Parker can offload from a boat in Switzerland completely blindfolded and still do it properly
Now I’m not just saying this because he is so obviously my most favourite player in the game – and possibly one of my biggest idols in the world – but Corey Parker is the King of offloads. While he missed game two due to an unfortunate facial fracture, Parker’s performances in game one and three were so outstanding that even I was surprised of all the tricks he was pulling out of his tight sleeves. It’s just like… how? His performance last night in game three was definitely worthy of the Man of the Match award he was so rightfully given. Well done, Cozza!

2. Trent Hodkinson is as great as everyone makes him out to be
I was personally not sold on Hodkinson being the halfback for NSW because I didn’t think he was that great in the Doggies. I just thought he was okay… above average at best. However, Hodkinson and his dark, dark soulless eyes proved me wrong, especially in game two where he brokeded my heart and won the series for NSW. Sadface. He’s actually a stellar playmaker for both the Blues and the Doggies and I will go on the record and apologise for selling him short.

3. Not everyone is cut out for Origin
So I went into the series believing that Dave Taylor was the most in-form forward in the league and it was a travesty that he wasn’t selected to be part of the team for game one. Alas, in game two, my prayers were answered, and Taylor proved me… wrong. I would literally cringe watching him get the ball because I knew it would be a matter of time before he dropped it. The same could be said for Matt Gillett and Chris McQueen. Both of these Queensland players are outstanding in their respective clubs – Gillett being in best career form for the Broncos – but in the Maroons side, they kind of failed. The same could be said about last year’s Blues halves, Mitchell Pearce and James Maloney.

4. Origin is more emotional than people think
During the last moments of game two, my anxiety kicked in and I literally had a panic attack over the game. After we lost the series in the most disappointing game two I’ve ever seen, you know what I did? I cried. I shed actual tears over a rugby league game. I retired to my bedroom to cry some more, and then my sister joined me, and then we ate Maltesers in the dark in complete silence. If that alone doesn’t highlight just how emotional this game can get, you’re kidding yourself.

5. Queensland isn’t unstoppable
Some footy fans were lulled into a false sense of security because our side has outstanding players, “The Big Four” included. Couple that with our eight in a row series wins and I went into the series thinking that we had this in the bag. I felt generally safe, thinking that until Slater, Cronk, Smith and Inglis would retire, we’d always win. Well, clearly we didn’t. When it comes down to it, the Blues played better overall and as much as I don’t like it, they deserved to win this year.

6. The no punching rule is stupid
I miss Origin biffs. Bring them back please. All these “let’s get into each other’s faces and breathe deeply and not do anything and mutter angry words to each other” situations are really pathetic. I was expecting to see some fists flying last night because, hey, NSW had already won, but no. It’s just part of the rugby league culture to get into a physical disagreement now and then. Deal with it.

7. Hayne is not better than Slater
The rivalry between these two players has been well documented over the years, so much that some Blues enthusiasts have said that Hayne is better than Slater. Well, Queensland fan or not, that is simply not true. If not demonstrated by Slater’s performance versus Hayne’s performance, Slater is clearly the more talented fullback. Even if he does get away with a couple of misdemeanours that others can’t.

8. The referees need some serious counselling
Now, I’m not going to single out one individual ref, but I think the NRL referees in general need some guidance when it comes to calling the most important rugby league series of the year. Too many times have we seen stupid calls made this year and that alone has ruined the spirit and buzz of Origin. Please, referees, I have four words for you: sort your shit out.

Needless to say, congrats to the Blues and their very aggressive fans. You finally broke our streak. But we’ll be taking our trophy back next year, thanks.

CALL TO ME, CALL TO MEEEEEE.

– by The Black Widow

Happy New Year!

Posted in Lifestyle by

Goodbye 2013, hello 2014.

2014, what year will you be to me?

2014, what year will you be to me?

New Years is always a good time to get together with friends and family and celebrate the new collection-of-365-days. It’s one of the best holidays of the year – unless you work in retail like me and don’t actually get New Years off (by choice) – so it’s important to kick back and relax during the day.

Alas, not every holiday is perfect. Just like people who hate car antlers during Christmas, there are some things that I dread every New Years…

Things I hate about New Years…
[x] The “this is what I did in the year and omg I am such a better person than I was 365 days ago” statuses you see on Facebook. They pop up EVERY year and people are always making fun of them, yet they seem to get more popular with each year. These are those ones that are like “2013 was such a good year for me. I did this, did that, also did this, also did that, omg my life is so amazing, my year was so better than yours”. Tough titties. I had an amazing 2013. I met my idol Corey Parker. Twice. Don’t see me bragging about it.
[x] The ones who make statuses mocking the aforementioned post above, but use it as an excuse to write the exact same thing they’re criticising. There is a special place reserved in hell for hypocrites.
[x] New Year’s Resolutions. Hate them. I don’t want to sound cynical but I just think people use the New Year as an excuse to set goals they could do on June 25th or September 14th, like, what is stopping you from making goals any other day in the year?
[x] People who complain that the year just had was shit and that the new year will be better. With an attitude like that, young lad or lady, all of your years are going to be shit. Just sayin’.

Just not to sound like a bitter hater, here are a few…

Things I love about New Years
[x] I love the camaraderie the celebration brings. A bunch of strangers flock up to Sydney Harbour and are so chummy with each other even though they will never see each other ever again. It’s a refreshing sight to see.
[x] Happy New Year text messages. While I obviously don’t need a reminder that it is a new year, I still like receiving these. Makes me feel loved.
[x] Fireworks pictures and videos. I don’t necessarily find the idea of fireworks entertaining but I still appreciate their beauty so even though I may miss some, at least there are photos and videos I can watch.
[x] Grog. ‘Nuff said.

Please keep these in mind, especially the things I don’t like. And train yourself not to do it when 2015 comes in. On behalf of the entire SolSat team, I wish you all a very Happy New Year! Here’s to an equally amazing year!

– by The Black Widow

Queensland Make It 8

Posted in Sports by

I am on the highest of highs… of highs. QUEENSLAND TAKE OUT ORIGIN FOR THE 8TH TIME IN A ROW!!

This needs no caption.

This needs no caption. SOURCE: NRL Facebook page

Tension was running high as the players ran out onto the field for the ultimate decider of the Origin series 2013. This was it. This was the moment. This was the moment for the Blues to shut up their naysayers and stop Queensland’s dominating streak, and the moment for the Maroons to continue their momentum from game two.

Queensland made the first half count with some early points from Queensland playmaker Johnathan Thurston who racked up a converted try and a penalty conversion. The Blues mounted a comeback with a try from McManus and ended the half at 8 – 4.

I could not sit down during the second half because I can honestly say a game of footy has not kept me on my toes like this in a very long time. The gruelling second half was intense and was nearly too hard for me to watch until my Broncos boy Hodges scored a try at the 61st minute which wasn’t successfully converted. All was well in the Queensland department until SolSat’s Golden Boy Corey Parker let in a try from Merrin at the 71st minute. My poor Parker.

In the final minutes of the game, 10-12 to the Maroons, it was all coming down to whoever was in possession. Just as I thought one of my personal favourites, the underrated Matt Scott would score a try, a stupid, fat, ignorant streaker ran onto the field to disrupt not only the brilliant game that had been played but Scott’s try. An array of colourful language threatened to escape my mouth but I managed to stop it. Streakers – be ready to see an opinion piece on them.

Queensland managed to keep possession in the final seconds of play and seize the victory over the Blues for their 8th straight victory in what was an unforgettable defeat.

Now, it’s time for the SOLST-O-METER!

Solst-o-meter
Even with what I perceived to be shotty officiating from one Shayne Hayne and an absolutely horrendous try-ruining streaker, my boys still managed to scrape up the victory and make it #8inarow.

1. Billy Slater – still exhibits his fine footy finesse and shows why he IS the greatest fullback in the game, despite your personal feelings for the man. RATING: Satisfied.
2. Darius Boyd – bleh first half, somewhat decent second half. If he didn’t ground that ball, I would’ve torn him a new one. RATING: Neither satisfied or dissatisfied.
3. Greg Inglis – I was still expecting a classic GI moment from him but didn’t get any of the sort. RATING: Neither satisfied or dissatisfied.
4. Justin Hodges – my bucking Bronco played excellent! Now if only he could bring that back to the Broncos, that’d be great. RATING: Satisfied.
5. Brent Tate – excellent form here by the Cowboy Tate. RATING: Satisfied.
6. Johnathan Thurston – hands down Man of the Match. RATING: Very Satisfied.
7. Cooper Cronk – some great play from Cronk, nothing earth shattering like I’m used to from him but still good. RATING: Satisfied.
8. Matt Scott – my poor Scotty, his Origin moment was taken from him. Either way, he was still incredible tonight. RATING: Satisfied.
9. Cameron Smith – the Captain of the Squad demonstrated exactly why he is the greatest player in the game today. RATING: Satisfied.
10. Nate Myles – good ol’ Myles, no punch ups this time thank goodness. Wasn’t outstanding but wasn’t bad either. RATING: Neither satisfied or dissatisfied.
11. Chris McQueen – good ol’ McQueen and his green eyes also did not wow me with his performance but he still played pretty well. RATING: Neither satisfied or dissatisfied.
12. Sam Thaiday – Thaiday started off the game firing on all cylinders then kind of went down after that but finished the game on a high. RATING: Satisfied.
13. Corey Parker – SolSat’s darling Corey Parker played the whole game excellently keeping up his great form… until he let that try in from Merrin. You could see that he was tired so I may let that one slide. RATING: Satisfied.
14. Daly Cherry-Evans – DCE didn’t play as well as he did in the second game but he was still fired up keeping me impressed nevertheless. RATING: Satisfied.
15. Ben Te’o – some excellent plays there from the former Bronco. He let out a penalty but also kept up some great defense. RATING: Satisfied.
16. Matt Gillett – my Bronco played well tonight despite giving away a penalty. Deserves a good pat on the back. RATING: Satisfied.
17. Josh Papali’i – the soft-spoken gentle giant’s defense is damn unmatched. His heavy hitting tackles are cringeworthy and then he just gets up with a cute smile on his face. RATING: Satisfied.

Congratulations Queensland Maroons, a well deserved win from all of you. Keep up the good work and make it 9 in a row in 2014! Now to celebrate my victory by decking myself out in Maroon when I go to college tomorrow. Noah out!

– by The Black Widow