Tag Archives: film

Review: The Other Woman

Posted in Entertainment, Movies by

With all this free time on my hands on the long Easter weekend, I was glad to see that the movies were still open. Even better? The Other Woman was showing; a movie that I had actually wanted to see, which is saying a lot considering I’m not a big movie person. I’d rather just wait til it’s on Foxtel or DVD or something.

Headed by a star cast including Cameron Diaz and Leslie Mann, I was expecting big things from this movie. And I wasn’t disappointed.

These three bombshells (and Nicki Minaj) made quite the trio (and Nicki Minaj). (CREDIT: Team Minaj Twitter page)

These three bombshells (and Nicki Minaj) made quite the trio (and Nicki Minaj). (CREDIT: Team Minaj Twitter page)

The Other Woman details the unfaithful life of Mark King, who is stringing along a number of women, including wife Kate, lawyer Carly, and young busty bombshell Amber. The unusual circumstances brings the three women together and, instead of getting mad, they decide to get even. Claws are out, Mark. Oh and somewhere along the way, Kate’s hot brother played by Taylor Kinney is thrown in.

I thought this movie did what it set out to – make people hysterically laugh. Not only was I in fits of laughter but the entire movie theatre (which was pretty packed, IMSAHO) were in fits of laughter. To borrow a wrestling term, the comedy “spots” in the movie were fantastic and on point. The film had that edgy sense of humour to it, where it was almost borderline too far but it never went that step further that it became inappropriate. While the main catty parts of the film came at the second half of the movie, the film’s humour was placed squarely on the shoulders of one character – Kate, played by Leslie Mann.

Leslie Mann played her character to perfection. The chatty, too-comfortable wife whose beauty is barely highlighted was made very evident in the first couple of minutes Mann’s face was on screen. Mann’s acting was on par, and I would go as far to say that if she wasn’t in this movie, it wouldn’t have been good. The character of Kate was practically made for Mann and she owned it. Cameron Diaz’s performance in the movie was acceptable; it was good but not crash hot that I have any particular comment on it. Kate Upton, God bless her little soul, wasn’t too good in the movie. She’s got a great rack and a pretty face but, like, I felt nothing from her. The star of the trio was, without a doubt, Leslie Mann. I didn’t get the point of having Nicki Minaj in the movie besides “OMG it’s Nicki Minaj”, and she wasn’t too believable as an actress either.

The storyline was very chick flick-esque with a somewhat predictable ending. Without giving too much away, I knew where Kate, Carly and Amber were all going to end up by halfway through the movie. The methods of revenge the ladies used, however, kept me laughing, and the acting on behalf of Nikolaj Coster-Waldau (who played the cheating, rotten bastard) made it all the more glorious to watch. As an audience member, I felt satisfied every time he… well, I won’t spoil too much. One thing I was quite skeptical on was the fact that all three women just became friends without even having a single catfight. In reality, women in this situation would have been very bitter towards each other and it would’ve taken a lot more than one D&M to get in the same book, let alone same page.

Oh, and did I mention Taylor Kinney was in this movie?

Solst-o-meter
Storyline: 7/10
Casting and acting: 8/10
Experience: 8.5/10
Overall: 7.5/10

I would definitely recommend this one to both ladies and gentlemen. It’s a light-hearted, fun movie that all will enjoy. The ladies have Taylor Kinney and the guys have Kate Upton. It’s pretty much a win-win. You will be rolling around laughing when this one is done.

– by The Black Widow

Review: Divergent

Posted in Entertainment, Movies by

Firstly, I’d like to make a quick shout out to my brother William who turned 23 on Friday! As tradition suggests, we had to do whatever he wanted, and that included watching the movie adaptation of Divergent, featuring my not so favourite actress, Shailene Woodley. I’m sorry but her character on Secret Life was irritating. #justsaying

Divergent was originally a novel written by Veronica Roth. (SOURCE: Naud/'s Flickr photostream)

Divergent was originally a novel written by Veronica Roth. (SOURCE: Naud/’s Flickr photostream)

Divergent tells the story of a post-war America that has a very specific but detailed way of living: inside their gated, unharmed-by-war community, the people live in five different factions: Abnegation, for those who are selfless; Erudite, for the brainy; Amity, for the peaceful hippies; Candor, for the sometimes-brutally honest; and Dauntless, for the brave and reckless. If you are not fortunate enough to fit in a faction, you are deemed “factionless”, which basically means you are dirty and homeless.

The film follows a young lady named Beatrice (later named “Tris”, as if that was a good idea), who was born in and lives with her family in Abnegation. Once people hit a certain age or stage of life, they are tested to see which faction they most fit, although they are given the choice to choose their own faction regardless of the test. Beatrice goes to get her test… uh oh. She fits all of them. She is a “Divergent”, which is basically a free-spirited rebel. Just to put things into perspective, being a Divergent is like being wrapped in raw meat and thrown into the Pacific Ocean.

My first observation of this movie was that it was very hard to follow. As soon as you are thrust into the movie, there are lots of facts and information thrown on you and it is your job as an observer to keep up. If you can’t keep up, tough titties! The movie goes on with or without your understanding. That, to me, was a very defining factor in my eventual disliking of the film.

The story of the film is very unique, and that’s a positive and a negative in its own right. It was an interesting way to tell a post-war America besides the usual “everyone is under arrest and some youthful rebel escapes and kills everyone”. In saying that, it was difficult for those unaware of the original story to follow. I thought the test was like the Sorting Hat from Harry Potter and you had no say in which faction you join, until Beatrice’s parents were crying and she was being dragged away.

The acting, for all intents and purposes, was okay, possibly saved only by my fair lady Kate Winslet (subtle shout out to Miss Benedicte Earl). As much as I don’t like her, Shailene Woodley is a decent actress. She is easy to believe as her character and she doesn’t have Kirsten Dunst face (a face that has no emotion whatsoever). Theo James, who was an unknown to me until this movie, looked as if he was trying too hard in my sweet and humble opinion. He’d be trying to act really hard and tough and scary but then would duckface his lips. It was quite funny to watch. Oh, and Jai Courtney was Eric was phenom. Mr. Courtney has found himself a new fan.

I get that the producers had a lot of content to fit in the film so not to disappoint the book fans, but man Divergent is one long ass movie. If my phone wasn’t dead in the cinema, I would have been constantly checking the time. As a plus, however, there was some humour thrown into the film that I found quite refreshing from all the serious faction stuff.

Solst-o-meter
Storyline: 6/10
Casting and acting: 6/10
Experience: 5/10
Overall: 6/10

I think if I had read the novel before watching the movie, I would have enjoyed it more, but the intensity of the film was too much for me to personally take in. The intent was there to deliver an excellent movie, but to me, it flopped pretty badly. I would recommend watching it, but maybe later when it’s out on TV or something.

– by The Black Widow

Common Romantic Misconceptions of Romeo and Juliet

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Because really, Romeo and Juliet isn’t that romantic.

When girls talking about finding their dream man, they will often refer to him as their “Romeo”. Guys don’t often talk to each other about feelings, but I’m sure if they do, they’ll call her their “Juliet”. I’d hate to be the bearer of bad news, but Romeo and Juliet aren’t as romantic as society makes them out to be. It seems as if people are too distracted by the artsy Shakespearean language to really understand what the characters are trying to say.

Don't be fooled by these young actors. They are misleading you! (CREDIT: Z. Smith Reynolds Library Flickr)

Don’t be fooled by these young actors. They are misleading you! (CREDIT: Z. Smith Reynolds Library Flickr)

Alas, as a Shakespeare enthusiast and all-around badass, I am here to set you straight and/or ruin your hopes and dreams.

Example one: The nurse and Juliet gossip like frivolous teenage girls
Picture two young women talking to each other about a man in today’s society. I’m sure their conversation would be along the lines of “Oh yeah, would bang” or “OMG put a baby in me.” Not in the slightest bit romantic, is it? That is exactly how Juliet and her nurse were talking about Romeo. “Why, he’s a man of wax”, a line that is famously quoted by Juliet, loosely translates into 21st century English and becomes “Crikey I’d go him.” Truth? Maybe. Romantic? Not unless you’re solely cruising for a root.

Example two: That balcony scene
This may be a bit too much for those who think this is the pinnacle of romance in cultural arts. It isn’t. Sorrynotsorry. Let’s start with the obvious one: Romeo is quite literally creeping on Juliet. I’m sure young ladies nowadays would freak out if they saw a guy watching them through their window muttering to themselves, so if it’s unacceptable now, why is it romantic a couple of hundred years ago? Creeper. Also, “It is the east and Juliet is the sun!” is, unfortunately, translated to “Farrrk I think she’s farrrkin’ hawt.” I guess it wouldn’t be so bad if he wasn’t creeping at her through the window.

Example three: I’d be sad if you died, but…
My (man’s) best friend died nearly four years ago now, God bless his soul. I wasn’t with him at the time of his passing which only added to the heartache I felt when I originally found out he had left me. Was I sad? Absolutely. I cried for that whole day and would often cry days later. Would I kill myself whilst sitting right next to him just so I could “be” with him? Um. No. This may be me sounding a tad cynical but what is so romantic about Romeo and Juliet killing themselves for each other? That is tragic and a tad bit obsessive. Not romantic at all.

Example four: Five minutes later
Granted, the star cross’d lovers probably had a bit more than five minutes to get to know each other, but they didn’t know each other all that long before they were prepared to give their lives for each other. I guess it’s kind of romantic, like the tiniest bit, but it’s intense and creepy overall. How would you feel if you met someone off Tinder and after their date, they were planning to kill themselves for you? Yes. Case closed.

I’m sure there are more examples I could use to highlight my point but you get the idea. Romeo and Juliet is not as romantic as it seems. Case closed. Soz not soz.

– by The Black Widow

I’ve Given Up On M.Night Shyamalan

Posted in Entertainment, Movies, Opinion by

I want to take a little time to recall some brilliant films. Do you remember a movie about a child who could see and talk to dead people? I do, and I remember it being full of genuinely frightening moments and an atomic bomb of a story twist; this was The Sixth Sense, directed by M.Night Shyamalan only fifteen years ago.

This is what everyone looked like watching it, don't lie.

This is what everyone looked like watching it, don’t lie.

I also fondly recall watching Unbreakable for the first time, which also contained a mind-shattering twist and a damn good cast of actors; again, Shyamalan is responsible for creating this cult film.

Badass

Badass

And here is where the problem comes to light; can you recall a film about trees who make people suicidal? If you can’t, pat yourself on the back, you really saved yourself time and sanity. The Happening was also the work of Shyamalan, the same guy who created instant classics and then went on to produce pieces of actual poop.

OH GOD, WHY TREES, WHY?

OH GOD, WHY TREES, WHY?

I have tried to keep calm in the face of such terrible film making, telling myself that it’s okay. Maybe he’s a one trick pony and theres only so long he can make twist endings work, maybe his first few movies were some sort of fluke, a moment of his insanity that happened to work. I did this over and over: with films like The Village, and Lady in the Water. But god dammit if I’m not tired of trying so hard. Not after what he did, not after making The Last Airbender.

One of the best television shows

One of the best television shows

One of the worst things in my life (Sorry, kid)

One of the worst things in my life (Sorry, kid)

Shyamalan, if you’re out there and somehow reading this obscure article: WHAT THE FUCK, MAN? You don’t do that. You just can’t take a wonderfully-written, highly-praised, beautifully-animated television show, take all the good things out of it, and drop it on the big screen. I wanted to stick by you, even through the awkwardly directed acting and plot holes, because although I’m always disappointed by you, your films always seem to have an interesting premise. But no, you really fucked up this time.

But even amidst that awfulness there seemed to be a silver lining; this film was so bad that there was no way he would ever direct again. Then came After Earth (vomiting sound), and now he is in the mix to produce three different television programmes, and heres hoping that he just stays as the producer.

Smug bastard

Smug bastard

The purpose of this article was to mostly rant, but also to voice my genuine concerns. Why does this man keep making films? Who keeps giving him the work? And more importantly, how do we stop it? This is coming from someone who really loved the film Signs. In all seriousness, that movie planted the seed for my phobia of extraterrestrials, and any person that can induce that has some amazing power. But I think that power has been abused and needs to be taken away.

– by Josefina Huq