I’m torn between two girls.
One of them I have a really strong physical connection with. We have amazing sex and she knows how to please me. On the other hand, the other girl just gets me, you know? We can talk about everything and anything.
I really like them both and don’t want to hurt either of them.
Dear Confused Guy,
This sounds awfully like a #DatingNikki case I had previously… if you are the guy she’s talking about, this is extremely awkies.
Either way, I’m going to give you the clichè that is so deftly placed in the headline of this column: “listen to your heart”. Basically what you’ve got is a good physical connection with one girl (who for the sake of this article we’ll call “Summer”) but your emotional connection is lacking, and you have a good emotional connection with the other girl (who for the sake of this article we’ll call “Layla”) but you’re not sure if you’ll have as good a physical connection with her.
I would personally base your decision on what you’re ultimately looking for: if you’re looking for something more long-term and substantial, then I would probably go with Layla. You can always establish a good physical connection with her once you get over the first awkward hump. You can spice things up to get your blood pumpin’ in the future while you can’t necessarily fake an emotional connection if you’re not legitimately feeling it with Summer.
If, on the other hand, you are just looking for a regular nightly or overnightly fling, then Summer is definitely the girl for you. If you’re worried about having a really bad physical connection with Layla, at least it’s guaranteed that you have a good one with Summer. In saying that, if you don’t feel as if you really get Summer as a person, then that may be a huge problem if you do venture into a long-term relationship with her.
My advice would be this: figure out what you want in life and then make your decision. The longer you keep this going – and depending on if the girls know about each other – someone is going to get hurt the longer you drag this out.
There’s always the swerve decision that you choose neither girl, but where’s the fun in that?
Happy dating… and go the Broncos!
– by The Black Widow
If you have a question or need some good ol’ fashioned blunt advice from #DatingNikki, use the Contact page on our website and put in your comment “Subject: Dating Nikki” or alternatively send me an e-mail at firstname.lastname@example.org and put “Dating Nikki” in the subject line. I will respond to your cries for help as soon as possible!